Episode 009

The Psychology of Healing:

Why We Fear Being Seen & Heard

Hosted by Jeremy de Tolly, featuring Bill Petrie

About this Episode

Healing isn't about becoming perfect—it's about becoming more fully yourself.

In this profound conversation, Jeremy de Tolly sits down with psychologist, psychotherapist and mentor Bill Petrie to explore what genuine healing actually looks like.

Bill brings 35 years of experience in psychology, psychotherapy, coaching and contemplative practice to the discussion. Together they unpack why so many of us fear being seen and heard, how childhood experiences shape our adult communication patterns, and why anxiety, shame and self-protection are often driven by younger "parts" of ourselves that still believe we're unsafe. They explore Internal Family Systems (IFS), trauma, embodiment, mindfulness, EMDR, EFT, nervous system regulation and the role of presence in becoming a more authentic communicator.

Rather than striving to eliminate anxiety completely, Bill and Jeremy discuss how healing allows us to relate differently to ourselves—developing greater self-compassion, truthfulness and the capacity to communicate from a place of grounded authenticity.

Whether you're struggling with speaking up in a group or one on one setting, or with leadership, relationships or simply wanting to understand yourself more deeply, this episode offers a compassionate roadmap toward becoming more fully human.

You will learn:

● Why fear of speaking often begins long before your first presentation.

● How childhood "parts" continue influencing adult communication The hidden role shame plays in public speaking anxiety.

● Why healing isn't about perfection—it's about integration.

● The importance of safety in any healing process.

● How mindfulness creates space between you and anxious thoughts.

● Why your body often knows the truth before your mind does.

● How EMDR and Clinical EFT help process unresolved trauma.

● Why relationships thrive when both people feel psychologically safe.

● What it means to communicate from presence instead of performance.